The Irvine Imperiled & Kilwinning Orange News

The Irvine Imperiled & Kilwinning Orange News

Friday 12 February 2016

Prodigy Frontman Wanted For Questioning After School Toilet Blaze

Professional Wanker & Frontman of The Prodigy Keith Flint is at the forefront of an investigation into the blaze at school toilet in Kilwinning.

Kilwinning Academy was shut down after a fire broke out in the school lavvies earlier this week. One pupil had to be treated for an anxiety attack after the blaze broke out.

Flint, no stranger to controversy, and who last month admitted to being a fox hunting prick has been spotted in the Kilwinning area and near the school when the fire broke out.

Twisted Firestarter Flint is wanted for questioning














A spokesperson for the Cooncil said 'While we don't know the exact cause, we can confirm that a fire was started in the school toilets this week and we had to evacuate the weans'.

Flint famous for being a twisted firestarter has been spotted by witnesses near the school, and alsohanging about the Kilwinning area near the time of the fire.

Flint spotted in Kilwinning during the week.
















Sgt Neil Howie of Saltcoats had this to say 'We've been alerted to the presence of this utter prick in the Kilwinning area this week. I'm afraid to say that there is a high level of suspicion on this character. Not only is he famous for professing to be a twisted Firestarter, but why would he be in the locale when such a crime has taken place? It all looks like a clean cut case that this miscreant is responsible for the blaze. Not only is he wanted for questioning for arson, but we would also like to speak to him about other crimes against music & fashion. We're making enquiries and going to places where he might be found. We will get our man! I've got a message for you Keith - Charlie says you're going down ya bampot!'

Sgt Howie of Saltcoats making enquiries at one of wanted Flint's haunts yesterday

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